i feel like binging.

i can literally smell the foods i am craving.

this is so damn hard.

141.4

job interview today

i'm scared, scared that i'm actually loosing this weight,
that the battle i've been fighting for the past four years might be reaching some sort of climax

i know weight loss isn't the answer to all my problems but i've never tasted skinny and i want to experience everything before i die.

i don't think being thin will necessarily scare all the monsters out from under my bed but if i never try i'll never know what it will do.

400 calories today.

probably jamba juice
maybe a bit of salad i pick up at the grocery store as well
we'll see

got the job.

the interview was so easy and my interviewer and i just ended up cracking jokes and laughing.

he said "i never, EVER hire people that arrive late, but i'm hiring you and if you do good in the training, promoting you."
i didn't even know what to say.

i'm pretty excited - it's my first job and it's doing something i love, helping animals.

intake-
strawberry whirl (300)
stir-fry veggies (120?)

close enough to 400

taking a test today that I am prepared for in no sense of the word.

movies also.

i've already seen "Howl" twice and i can't wait to see it a third.

600 calories today.

probably have subway.

i don't know.

last night i had a bit of a breakdown in the bathroom at school.

i guess this time it's really happening.

i have a job interview tomorrow.

i miss my love.

in - water
      6-inch Veggie Delight (300) 

142

jamba juice strawberry whirl - 380
handfuls of popcorn - 400?

walked around all day today. 

its been a while.